The Real Kindergarten Readiness Checklist: From a Former Kindergarten Teacher

When we hear the phrase “kindergarten readiness,” we often picture kids reciting the alphabet or writing their name in crayon. And sure… knowing your letters before the first day is great. But, that’s not what matters most.

As a psychology professional, former early childhood teacher, and education advocate, I’m here to offer a real checklist, supported by research and lived experience, of the skills that actually help kids succeed in the classroom, emotionally and academically.

Emotional Regulation > Memorization

Let’s start with one of the biggest predictors of success in kindergarten and all of life: the ability to manage emotions. This means hearing a firm “no” without spiraling, asking for help before melting down or shutting down, and transitioning between tasks (like play to clean-up) without needing a personal parade.

Research supports this. According to Denham et al. (2012), children with stronger emotional competence show higher academic engagement and better peer relationships. Another study by Graziano, Reavis, Keane, & Calkins (2007) found that preschoolers with better emotion regulation skills were more attentive, had fewer behavioral issues, and performed better academically in early schooling.

Patience & Perseverance Are Built, Not Born

Kids need opportunities to practice waiting, problem-solving, and trying again. Whether it’s waiting their turn in a game or eating lunch within a 20-minute school schedule, the classroom doesn’t revolve around their individual timeline… and that’s a big adjustment for many.

According to Blair & Raver (2015), executive functioning, which includes working memory, inhibitory control, and cognitive flexibility, is a stronger predictor of school success than early academic skills. These are the mental muscles that help a child persist through frustration, follow instructions, and self-regulate in busy environments.

Independence is a Form of Confidence

Yes, your child needs to be able to wipe themselves after using the bathroom. And (at least attempt to) open their own snack and put on their own shoes , or ask a grown-up appropriately if they can’t.

Why? Because independence fosters both confidence and reduces teacher overload. With a room full of 20+ kids, every skill your child can do independently creates more time for learning and less stress for everyone involved.

A 2014 study by the Kindergarten Readiness Indicators Initiative found that self-care skills were just as important as academic ones for teacher-reported success.

It Does Take a Village… But It Works Best When We’re All in It

Here’s something we don’t talk about enough:
Teachers show up every day to be part of your child’s village.
But too often, they aren’t allowed to lean on that same village themselves.

When I was a teacher, I remember feeling defeated, not because I didn’t love my students, but because I couldn’t give them what they truly needed. I couldn’t give extra time to the student falling behind, or bring a lesson to life the way I dreamed, because I was too busy switching roles.
From teacher, to behavioral interventionist, to lunch lady, to butt-wiper.

Moms and teachers alike are assigned more roles in a day than they’ll ever get credit for. And the truth is , we shouldn’t be expected to do it all alone. We should be leaning on each other.

The parents who collaborate, ask questions, and trust their child’s teacher? Their kids feel it.
And the teachers who are trusted and respected by families? They teach better because they feel supported, not blamed.

So… What Actually Makes a Child “Ready”?

Here’s what readiness really looks like:

• Can use the bathroom from start to finish independently

• Can wait patiently for a turn, snack, or help

• Can follow 1–2 step directions

• Can ask for help before melting down

• Can hear and accept correction from adults

• Can eat within a time limit (no grazing, please!)

• Can handle gentle feedback and mild teasing with support

• Can initiate or join play with peers

• Can hold a pencil, manage scissors, and stay at a task for 5–10 minutes

• Can express emotions and separate from a caregiver (with some regulation)

  Academic Foundations in New Jersey Kindergarten

  (Yes, we teach ABCs & 123s… but what else?) — NJSLS-aligned overview

  In New Jersey, the New Jersey Student Learning Standards (NJSLS) outline clear expectations for what students should know and be able to do by the end of kindergarten across all developmental domains (New Jersey Department of Education [NJDOE], 2020).

  English Language Arts (ELA)

  The 2023 ELA standards for kindergarten include:

  • Recognizing and naming all upper- and lowercase letters

  • Understanding the basic conventions of print (e.g., left to right, top to bottom)

  • Developing phonological awareness (rhyming, syllables, sound blending/segmentation)

  • Applying phonics skills to decode simple words

  • Beginning writing by forming letters, writing one's name, and drawing to express ideas (NJDOE, 2023a)

  Mathematics

  Kindergarten students are expected to:

  • Count to at least 20 and identify quantities up to 10

  • Compare objects by size, length, and number

  • Recognize and name basic shapes

  • Solve simple addition and subtraction problems using visual models or objects

  • Recognize, create, and describe patterns (NJDOE, 2023b)

  Whole‑Child Learning Domains

  In addition to literacy and math, the standards emphasize:

  • Comprehensive Health and Physical Education – teaching wellness, self-care, and basic body awareness

  • Social Studies & Science – understanding community, weather, environment, and cause-and-effect

  • Visual & Performing Arts – engaging in music, movement, drama, and creative expression

  • Social-Emotional Learning (SEL) – developing self-awareness, relationship skills, and responsible decision-making

  • Computer Science & Design Thinking – fostering early logic, problem-solving, and basic coding skills (NJDOE, 2020)

  Why This Makes the Other Skills So Important

  Yes…recognizing letters, counting, and understanding basic print and number sense are core to the curriculum. But here’s the catch:

  Teachers can’t effectively deliver these academic goals if they're constantly pulled into behavioral or caretaking roles. Every time a teacher stops a lesson to manage a meltdown, wipe a nose, or mediate a social conflict that could’ve been prevented with early guidance at home, valuable learning time is lost.

  That’s why kids need those foundational social, emotional, and self-care skills before they can truly engage in the academic demands of kindergarten.

Let's Normalize Supporting Teachers

The truth is, teachers want to help your child succeed. But they can’t teach if they’re constantly helping kids with basic social-emotional skills that should be developing at home.

Kindergarten isn’t the “start” of parenting , it’s the continuation of the social, emotional, and behavioral lessons we lay the foundation for in early childhood.

When we work together… as parents, educators, and caregivers, our kids thrive. That’s the mission behind Little Prodigy Prep.

References:

Blair, C., & Raver, C. C. (2015). School readiness and self-regulation: A developmental psychobiological approach. Annual Review of Psychology, 66, 711–731. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-psych-010814-015221

Denham, S. A., Bassett, H. H., & Zinsser, K. (2012). Early childhood teachers as socializers of young children’s emotional competence. Early Childhood Education Journal, 40(3), 137–143.

Graziano, P. A., Reavis, R. D., Keane, S. P., & Calkins, S. D. (2007). Emotion regulation and children’s early academic success. Journal of School Psychology, 45(1), 3–19.

Sheridan, S. M., Knoche, L. L., Kupzyk, K. A., Edwards, C. P., & Marvin, C. A. (2010). A randomized trial examining the effects of parent engagement on early language and literacy: The Getting Ready intervention. Journal of School Psychology, 48(3), 271–292.

Talwar, V., & Lee, K. (2011). Emerging understanding of lying in young children. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 20(4), 284–287.

New Jersey Department of Education. (2020). New Jersey student learning standards: Introduction. https://www.nj.gov/education/standards/

New Jersey Department of Education. (2023a). New Jersey student learning standards for English language arts – Kindergarten. https://www.nj.gov/education/standards/ela/2023/kindergarten.shtml

New Jersey Department of Education. (2023b). New Jersey student learning standards for mathematics – Kindergarten. https://www.nj.gov/education/standards/math/